Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Passing the halfway mark

Anna has been gone for five days now and won't be back for another three. Not surprisingly the adults are taking the separation harder than the children.

I spent the first two days marveling at how quiet my house was and the third day an emotional teary mess. Luckily for everyone I was much too busy yesterday to go running into bathrooms for sixty-second cry breaks.

Staying occupied does seem to be the key to resisting the inclination to mope, for both me and Rachel. While we have gotten plenty of quality relaxation and cuddle time together, I seem to feel calmer and less anxious - and yes, less sad - when I am actually doing something.

Of course Anna is everywhere and I've still had a few moments where the intensity with which I miss my first born hits me full force. Like when I came across this:

Pingu. By Anna. I've never seen this before, which really surprised me because Anna usully announces it when she starts drawing something new and when she's perfected her new subject she demands recognition and finds a place for it on the refrigerator (where Rachel will move it or change the magnets and generally drive my little OCD 4-year-old nuts, but that is another post I suppose).

I found this guy in Anna's sketch pad near several other tries to get her favorite penguin just right. I took one look at the yellow outlining the white belly and all the other details she worked so hard on and I fell apart again. Dan and I just looked at each other and smiled as the tears welled up in my eyes and I was glad Rachel was in bed.

I tore the drawing out of her sketch pad and put it on the fridge for her return. Which cannot come soon enough. At least I have this to keep me company in the meantime:

And really, how sad can you be with that smile nearby?

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